(See Neurosis vs. 4. The clients are who will get you paid and promoted with enough support. Please share with us your experience and story. 20% : Little cerebral involvement until late. Then when she graduated, she got all the best jobs everyone envied/wanted and made more salary $$ than most others. Pingback: Spoiled Or Clueless? jk. * I am alone. Sam, LOVE YOU! Its like you wrote this for me. Glad you got a chuckle, but Im being serious! If you are working much more than expected and you arent being compensated, then at some point that means you are getting taken advantage of. One very important thing overlooked in this article is playing dumb to make the other person feel smart. Thanks for making me realize Im not! I had 130,000 in June. Just now starting an internship in Finance, Ive just now started scooping into my humble pie. Thx. You know what I'm talking about. Great article Sam. Good article, Sam! I also sell a product with coaching and very few people even contact me with that. includes several powerful add-ons allowing users to get more jobs done quicker So if you can mold yourself as looking less experienced, then you will naturally seem less worthy of bigger roles. I also told the boss that I watch body language too (I took a few courses in such many years ago and not just reading a book or google hit, but full fledged courses they give to mid-upper mgmt.) The key is to not be so slow as to annoy the other person. Ive often thought that this behavior hasnt been rewarding, in the sense that people who do more talking and respond quickly with less thoughtfulness tend to do better, but Im happy to stay as I am. And when you start bragging about your achievements, people start hating your guts. I never know anything off hand- always have to do reasearch. The listener will start getting agitated and think to themselves, No I don't know what you're saying you idiot!. Would you like to join the discussion on Acting Innocent and Playing Dumb as Manipulation Tactics? Ive never worked closely with any female in my school projects or workplaces. Unfortunately, haters gonna hate and they will do what they can to pull you back down into mediocrity land and blending in really is the way to keep things cool. Exactly. Cheers. It can get very annoying and will eventually agitate the person youre asking to the point they dislike you or avoid you. oh, but bill gates is billions of times smarter than you. The smart people are usually more quiet and kind of studious. The next time you're hit with an insult, use a good comeback from this list: I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarter statement than whatever you just said. Pretend to be weak, that he may grow arrogant. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. If you want to take it a step further, include rhetorical questions such as, You know what I'm saying? multiple times. Wear some mismatching outfits. Thats not only because neurotics find it uncomfortable to accept the notion that not everyone is of benign character but also because traditional psychological schools of thought have never adequately identified and correctly defined character disturbance and the kinds of behaviors typically associated with it. So I advise people who might be in relationships with disturbed characters to be aware of the tactics they frequently use to evade responsibility and manipulate others. Be smart enough to suppress your achievements. I studied art history in school and the great portraits that I loved, by Velazquez or Gainsborough, or Sargent, or great examples of architecture Versailles, country estates in England or Rhode Island or Boston, would never have been created if patrons had shied away from showing their wealth. Your speech is often a dead giveaway for your level of intelligence. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room. And then I take my rocket scientist brain and wrap it all up and report on it. Be smart enough to recognitions these strategies that will make you look dumber. I wondered why the other analysts were nice to to me and then I realized that they didnt perceive me as a threat. This is the first time Ive read someones take on this subject. Impact Suite includes many enhancements to help Act! Even if 1% email you a question, that is 10,000 emails you must respond to. You just need to be better at being smart instead of getting better at being stupid. Impact for Act Im also into dressing down. Then I moved to US for school. I had some ideas I bounced off of him and he said they were great but cautioned not to push too hard when you get a new position. I liked the recognition that came with being needed. Unless you are Fraser Crain, nobody speaks with words like pernicious, erudite, colloquial, nadir, vapid, boorish and so forth. So, trust me..being dumb pays. No security person in the world wants to present their supervisor with a total idiot; best just to wave the dummy through and be rid of him. A colleague did just that (under promise and over delivered while acting dumb), and everyone was surprised and happy with her end result. Whatever your interaction with them, its fun, successful, and you go away from it feeling that theyre smart and wonderful, but nothing exceptional. I agree with the others who mention self promotion. Share your failures instead. In short, it is because I have become too smart. Dude, I guess Ive been doing this subconsciously, after reading this, I started to catch myself doing it, Ill be honest I started laughing in my head, I thought I was going nuts. Articles like this excite me because they make me feel like Im a mastermind secretly plotting to take over the world in a few years. Mirroring and modeling are two tenets of Neuro-Linguistics Programming (NLP, google it), very helpful in communicating, persuading, and establishing an exchange of information. :-D ). I did okay with bullion and real estate, and live in a blue color mountain town, although I started out as blue color carpenter. Especially in places like Russia where they ask a billion questions (sometimes even when simply entering a museum) for no reason at all. This post actually serves as I nice reminder to remain humble and maintain humility. Its such a shame why cant we have a world where smart people give advice 24/7 and we can all just listen and absorb it?! Whos the dumbass here. Achieved some interesting things but still not there. (I'm a 19 year old Boy btw) I always act dumb and even child like in social situations but I don't know why? So maybe I over compensate by letting them know Im no dummy and instead I end of up being that super competitor you described. I will often fart loudly and drool during meetings. Durkin Addons, Inc. is a leading Act developer since 2005. Pretty dumb, if it hasnt been apparent in this post. You've heard the saying, I'm going to wipe that dumb grin off his face! right? It is that he has no idea how to hire a tailor to make them look right on his weird centaur frame. When folks start highlighting their great investment wins, I simply listen in, congratulate and smile. If you can produce the silent but deadly ones, you can blame someone else for the stench. In an earlier post, I talked about never accepting I dont know for an answer when confronting disordered characters. And here Im thinking about the other people who wouldve delivered the same result but if they didnt act so dumb, people wouldnt be so happily surprised with the result. All rights reserved. Be Smart Enough To Act Dumb There are three main reasons why acting dumb will help you succeed in life. However, there are tricks to alter your speech to make yourself seem dumber. Being smart in a dumb world is awesome. Thank your mind and name the story. But when the sheets are tallied up, and work hours to profit is calculated, those are the stars. :). Theres a time and place for everything, of course. when i dumb down im not taken seriously. Im gonna keep my big mouth shut long enough to learn something. Then take your intellect (power, time, value, whatever measure) and trade it for people skills. I stick more with the common sense approach in most situations and if it calls for working extra and promoting myself to get ahead Im doing it. 99 likes. Oh and the dressing part was spot on. This behavior is seen in immature adults, who desire attention at . Feeding the karma basket with some goodwill and a kind word (of small talk) can pay great dividends; relationships are built over long periods and many interactions. I know about ad targeting but this explanation doesnt quite suffice since someone else noticed the same on a different computer and those kinds of searches are blocked here and therefore not done. They'll ask you to analyze their current investments and see if you have recommendation for where they can rebalance. Wonderful article! Some people are aggressive and arrogant, and that works for them, but Ive found that being a wolf in sheeps clothing is much more effective, especially for women. I understand everything. Its really interesting though and this is something I have done most of my life. Reddit, Inc. 2023. In both college and workplaces, I find my peer engineers just love bloating about the tech stuff they know and things theyve built to everyone around them. 9 Things Only Passive-Aggressive People Do | Psychology Today After 13 years working on Wall Street and getting his MBA, Sam decided to negotiate a severance package in 2012 and retire early. Well, at least the guy is still new, so you can abuse him a little! Ta-Ta, Your email address will not be published. No longer do people want to just view ads. Try Working Minimum Wage Jobs | Financial Samurai. I am not saying you lie or pretend to know things you dont, but you should promote yourself and your knowledge. In the context of negotiating a deal, however, I think the dumb or inquisitive approach works well. I used to get frustrated that things would get dumped on me, and Id pick up others slack. Four of my seven person developer team were women and two of us were minorities. Russian embassy demands to know that Skripals are 'safe and sound' . The smartest people in the world are listeners, not speakers. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. 2) Provide some tips to help you look and seem a little dumber than you are. When traveling alone, you can be anyone you please. Bingo! I use this strategy all the time and YES it works. Granted a lot of what you said just compared being dumb to having a warm personality. haha I do that all the time but didnt realize there was a term for it :). He also consistently beat his index benchmark for eight years in a row and made millions because of it. I thought I was very smart the first two years on Wall St. (GS), then I realized I thought too much of myself. So long as you act dumb enough to not get taken advantage of or run over at work, but consistently BEAT expectations people have of you and your work, then you will continue to get promoted. Unsplash / Brooke Cagle. In essence, its all playing dumb, but playing dumb and playing interested go hand in hand and can stroke the ego of both those below and above you in an organization. I also love the history of fashion and long for the time when people took pride in looking very sharp and well turned out up until the 80s. Privacy Policy. :). If you are going to ask for a raise, or a favor, or a hand in marriage, you want to make sure of the receptiveness of the other with a little small talk. I intentionally copy their words, their posture, their tone, speed, words, and mannerisms. But Ill let you in on a secret I act dumb around my team members sometimes. Then, acting dumb to get ahead in lifestyle is a decent strategy to consider b/c you might reach a point where you become inundated with work and absolutely unhappy with all the stress and pressure. At work (a software comp.) What is your definition of success? Dont do this. The main ways to alter your speech to make you look dumber is by adding the words like and umm in your sentences. Some people still didnt get I played dumb and that just shows how stupid they were. I was lucky to find a job out of college working for a company that had diversity as a core value. Thosewho've followed me for a while know that I have workaholic tendencies that can easilymanifest itself with some prodding. I hate dressing up so dressing younger or down is natural to me. Thats not to say theres anything wrong with ambition or competitiveness! (Very) Thought provoking too. (People say Im cute/pretty, if its relevant.). I really enjoy making friends with people from all over. Paranoid Personality Disorder (4.4%) These individuals aren't just careful about home security, they are obsessed with the suspicion that others are intentionally trying to do them harm . If youre a genuine listener and you ask thoughtful/leading questions, its amazing the stuff people will divulge! Thank you for the post. For example, I'm constantly answering e-mails from people who have personal finance questions. For example, I finished an engineering degree and managed to stay within the 80% curve by spending time studying just 1/3 of what others did. I also come from a culture where respecting your elders is of great importance, so I just assume that whatever I say to a younger person will be heard. A large percentage of people, especially younger people, are completely uninterested in others until they need them for something. I mean, when everyone around you treats you like youre completely stupid in the end you kind of believe that you are. Feigning ignorance is an effective tactic that manipulates the person confronting the behavior into having doubts about the legitimacy of the issue theyre trying to bring to the other persons attention. Go to Outbound > Test Messages, hover over your email, and click Report. NEWSMAX Saturday, June 24, 2023 | Newsmax | Watch NEWSMAX LIVE for the (for what I think) And it may not be appropriate for others situations as they so eloquently state, but you (IMO) are spot-on for what I consider a good reason to play dumb. Its not really the playing dumb, its allowing others to contribute and learning from what they know. I had a manage who would push you to work hard by micro-managing. And yes, Im still employed. All you gotta do is change or adjust :). It reflects on what I have been through. "When someone isn't . Not the analysts. He violates most of the things he says at some later point and lies readily to cover almost anything even when he doesnt need to. Practice speaking like a middle school student and you will do just fine, yo. I talk and ask questions about them! Some of the people who commented here don not have to pretend they are stoopid. Many people don't want mentors or teachers, they just want to be equal friends. Thank you so much for your contribution to this world. If he is taking his ease, give him no rest. Act dumb Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster 6 Dry Texting Signs That Mean They're Not Interested In You While others are already there without worry of being labeled dumb. I might be a bit off here from what O said, but I quite agree with their reasoning. These responses really show results, and I don't mean paying insult for insult either. It might even seem easier to blow off toxic people and deal with the inevitable obstacles, large and small, we encounter in work and life. What a hero you are to point out this to authentic smartos. to pretend to not know or not understand something. Glad Google is working! I didnt start off agreeing with this post but I think I see where you coming from a little better now. I don't have this arrogance problem at all when I'm hanging out with older people due to my customs. I feel like when I act dumb and child like people don't expect much from me, like me more, feel more comfortable around me and don't bully me. He looks like crap and acts worse. I was doing a completely unrelated search that included the words dumb people because of a comment I heard was supposedly made by a Facebook executive. The relevancy of this post is more directed within your workplace setting. Every company's marketing department should hire veteran bloggers because content marketing is huge in the internet world. But in a room full of sad and miserable people, you dont really want to stand out and smile. Glad to hear you are working on optimizing the quality of your life. Archived post. New hire. Being egocentric. I look to dump people succeed and me not so much! There is a great joy at being a nobody. When entering a new work environment I always want to set the bar to such a point that I know I can over deliver if needed. Don't play dumb with me - I know you took the money. Good stuff Chris. Now I work independently. Dont think they have to read my dribble. Ive met people who can do nothing but small talk and cant help but think theyre as dumb as posts. except your people skills will be easily detected as insincere by people you interact with who are genuine AND intelligent. This specific article was originally published by Dr George Simon, PhD on March 10, 2009 and was last reviewed or updated by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on March 16, 2009. https://counsellingresource.com/features/2009/03/10/manipulation-by-acting-dumb/. Why the hell should we exert so much more effort when we can do exactly #2. This is both a combination of letting them go on and on about whatever task they are doing, but also taking an active interest and asking somewhat obvious questions that you know they are going to get right about the process. . If you are being considered for a manager position they are going to look at a couple of things. I was 7th in the list of people selected out of nearly 50k who attended across the country. Someone is always gunning for you if you are one of the top dogs. Can you include me in the group you label as everybody? There are those who are good at what they do, and toot their horn too often but (I think) that when they fall its a lot harder for them than if someone else falls. Playing dumb isnt hard for me at all. Testing at KSU may also be requested through Quest Labs as Rabies Vaccine Response End Point Titer (order # 5789). 5 Truths about What Upsets a Sociopath You ignore them They can't get what they want Their control is taken away You question their authority You catch them in a lie Final Thoughts Differences between Psychopaths and Sociopaths Psychopaths Cold and calculating Calm and measured under pressure whistling in the dark phrase. Our material is not intended as a substitute for direct consultation with a qualified mental health professional. Put on your best poker face. And if there's a massive trap a friend is about to walk into, I'll definitely step up and provide some guidance. Building wealth is only a part of the equation. Youd think theyd figure it out or notice, right? I realized you were speaking figurativelyI mean using it as an exampleI felt dumb. Hard to disagree with a common sense approach. You barely have to work if you play your cards right. Feigning ignorance is an effective tactic that manipulates the person confronting the behavior into having doubts about the legitimacy of the issue theyre trying to bring to the other persons attention. If you act dumb + smile and act extremely happy you get the bar of both worlds. Idiocracy in action. Im surrounded by colleagues with ridiculous pedigrees typically Ivy League undergrad followed by top 20 MBA program. Instead of declining to work on a project, a passive-aggressive. Phone, no problem! But thats the way it is sometimes. sales@impactact.com +1 973 625 1119. PLAY/ACT DUMB (phrase) definition and synonyms | Macmillan Dictionary Buy some shirts and pants that are one size too big. I recently got a promotion, and when that happens people try to solve every problem the company faces. So instead, I sometimes pretend I don't have an opinion or I don't know when an absolute stranger who has never commented here before asks me questions. Can I give you some money? Im not close to jacked by any means. Plus its a big company so change takes a long time anyway. You never see an evil genius smile. Welcome to my site! Smile people!!!!! For the past 2 years, Ive been acting dumb, asking lots of questions, and delegating wherever possible. It's like a coping mechanism. The Top 10 Personality Disorders: Symptoms and Signs He told me a month about how he was trading stocks since he was 13. Maybe exchange for some for extra free time if you can. (I have quite a creative bend of mind, so I choose which topics to study and they come on the question paper 99% of the time). In other words, I look like a student even though I'm 37 years old (back in 2014). 100% of all dumb people know this, but only 15% of smart people do. play/act dumb phrase. Because I worked for a large firm, we were always expected to be in the top 3 with clients, even though only three firms can be in the top three! No ones wiser:). For a long time I didnt realize why people I barely met hated me so much. (Im a 19 year old Boy btw) I always act dumb and even child like in social situations but I dont know why? They want to think of most people as good and kind and hate to think that people really harbor malevolent intentions. Perhaps it's made us impatient, or shortened our attention spans, or diminished our ability to understand long thoughts. Using the rest of the tips you outlined it is clear that the answer is to be jacked and yet act like a teddy bear. Cheers. 5 Toxic Arguing Techniques Narcissists Use | Psych Central While for others, its not intimidating. I also surround myself with people much brighter than me. Our post on office politics agrees with practically all the other points said in a different way of course. But sometimes I get frustrated because there are certain people that think they are the smartest in the room and they act like Im something less than them just because im "stupid", so they belittle me. 1) Argue why acting dumb is a smart move to get ahead. Exactly. But it seems like they construct some mysterious workplace brogrammer/bromance relationship this way. You need to also learn how to convince people you're not very good at what you do to lower expectations. Therefore, if you stand out too much you will probably get hammered down unless you are a super nice person who tries to bring EVERYBODY up with you. Be smart enough to realize these realities. 9. People like you are the reason I'm on medication. Most jobs just dont require THAT much intelligence, at least not as much intelligence as needed in school. 1) Argue why acting dumb is a smart move to get ahead. But in most cases, with just about anything in life (not limited to work), success is all about exceeding expectations. If you have brains, the meaning will become apparent. CounsellingResource.com is accredited by the Health on the Net Foundation. Ive found it best in these situations to mimic mannerisms from Cosmo Kramer from Seinfeld. Automate emails, task and scripts with ease using a simple 1-2-3 designer. Idk I just feel like Ill never be able to be myself because my whole life all I was taught is that I need to change my self to be liked by others). To quote: Great. If I change my speech to sound dumb Ill lose credibility with my colleagues and clients. By pretending to be in the dark about many things a new or younger person discusses with me that I know about, I'm able to reduce my arrogance andcreate a more equal relationship. I have to grit my teeth to get through the weather out there conversations. People are complicated. I think when you own yor business or are in sales you cant act dumb. Anyway, I noticed my peers behaviors towards me after two months of working. If you dont make what your peers make, you fail. She clearly was faking dumb. How to Deal with Attention-Seeking Behaviors | Psychology Today I believe if you do your job and do it well, no one can make you look bad or jeopardize your work. Damned if you do, and damned if you dont. Impact for Act. You are still pandering to the dumblocs. This article is part of the series on Manipulation Tactics. As I enter my twilight years of employment I do practice this and do wish I had adopted this personna earlier. However, in creative development environments (i.e., software companies) and in sales-driven organizations where the emphasis is on what you actually create/do/bring in how you act is often less important than your DEEMED contribution in terms of ideas, creativity, execution, and results. Your clients are not your competitors, they are your huge support group if you service them well. I hope this isnt considered too talkative, or advise. You have one of the best financial independence site on the web,and definitely the most unique site. Never too late to implement some new stuff to the repertoire. 1. Ill admit that I do act dumb with clients, particularly when trying to understand their business, but in reality its not acting dumb as much as realizing I dont know as much as them until ive spent time with them. At the end of the day, knowledge is power. If you begin to think that a friend is ignoring you, it might feel . Nope, people cant see it at all. Attack him where he is unprepared, appear where you are not expected. : to pretend not to know something If anybody asks you where I am, act dumb. Account Cart: Download Today! Ive got a decent southern accent, but my ethnicity kinda makes it less believable though if we meet face to face. What kind of impression do I want to give off to my wife and kids by being out of shape, dumb, complacent? Seeing as being a dummy is the only way to spot one. How to deal with idiots and jerks: 16 effective tips Youve for to be careful asking too many questions without providing value in return. Thanks so much. Its prob like a trauma response since I was heavily neglected as a child and sometimes even abused and I felt like the more childlike I would act the more my parents would like me and love me and care for me. Home; Contact; FAQs . Looking dumber is a strategic move that will minimize competition and attention on you. Watch NEWSMAX LIVE for the latest news and analysis on today's top stories, right here on Facebook. Such an original post, Sam. Great article. 20 Savage Replies You Can Say For The Best Comebacks They'll ask you about the next hot IPO or your views on the Federal Reserve's latest interest rate policies and how it will affect cyclical stocks. When you're constantly expected to be the best, you're setting yourself up for failure. Wait for them to make a mistake. I will stop comparing myself with other people. im done coming to you with my ideas especially when you use the roll of family. I think the term playing dumb isnt what some want to be associated with. Yin Yang strategy. I googoo searched what to do if your boss is dumber than shit. Why do I act dumb on purpose in social situations? Its only when you see them interacting with other scary smart people that you realize just how truly intelligent they are. Here are 6 clever comebacks that only the smartest people use. The more other people know how much you know, the higher the expectations they have of you. When that happens, you'll be bombarded with even more hate and jealousy. People tend to take advantage of your time once you show a little bit of kindness. Being treated like a younger employee than reality is just fine by me because manyof my colleagues are under 30 years old as well. The only way to respond in a manner that catches the attention of rude people it seems is to be armed with clever comebacks. Two they are going to picture you as the manager and try to imagine how you would fit in that role, visual perspective will be important. I ended up at your website through a google search for Im dumb but I think Im smart.. Nobody ever did anything great by pretending to be dumber or less capable than they are. gates IQ is in the 150 range. I hear what youre saying about management having really high expectations that can be unreasonable. I had a role as a consultant is to manage a team of writers and write content. For me, though, the emphasis is just a little different: Repeat after me: 1) you get to keep the initial wow favor of being physically scary The one time I find its truly helpful to play dumb is when dealing with customs or security guards. Atlanta . So this thoroughly degrading self hating stupid guy blames hisself for his business model getting stolen rather than blame the sociopathic tosspot/s that actually stole his business model ideeyuh in the first instance. Don't be quick witted and answer questions in lightening pace. They discuss random shit like pros and cons of each programming language with each other, I know what they are talking about but I have no interest joining these kind of debates. It was like magic, it completely diffused the situation and he totally redirected his haranguing on someone else. Just not my style. Your secrets are always safe with me.
Wilde Lake Middle School Shooting,
Shepherd's Choice Goat Kid Milk Replacer,
Articles I